love of local in Utah
A Mother’s Book of Secrets Discussion Part 5 of 5
Like I said we are meeting here every Monday to discuss the book A Mother’s Book of Secrets by Linda Eyre & Shawni Eyre Pothier. Because I was in real need of a “Mothering Pick Me Up” and this is already helping me out quite a bit.
You really don’t have to be reading the book along with us to participate in the conversation, I am sure these are points that you already know tons about as a mother. So please join on in. I will start off with some of the points that stood out to me, quotes I loved, things I need to work on, and goals I have made.
Section 5 Key Points:
- Your job as a parent will change from taskmaster, referee, and drill sergeant to one of consultant.
- Have kids set their own goals and feel ownership of them
- The Repenting Bench-have the kids sit together and admit to what they did, say sorry for it, and hug
- Teach them to work hard and serve hard
- Let them work hard to earn big things so they can feel how rewarding it is!
- Help them with a “Decisions I Have Made” list to instill: virtue, honesty, and healthy living
- Teach them about money so they: feel ownership, how to save for a future cause, how to feel delayed gratification, how to spend wisely, save carefully, and how to give to others.
P.P.S. I sent the book to five of you out there, hope to hear from you!!!
Want to catch up?
This was our last section, it was fun to do with you guys, I have learned so much, thank you!
“Ownership is key to changing your job description as a parent from taskmaster, referee, and drill sergeant to one of consultant.”
Having kids set their own goals will make them more motivated to accomplish things than if it’s just their parents harassing them about it.
How to make life HARDER to make it BETTER? Be the example. Work when you don’t want to. Offer to “let” them help you. Make goals for the day, team goals.
Making their own decisions is like making pacts with themselves. They are more likely to keep promises that they agreed to willingly after they have thought it out than they are to just do what you say because you said it. Like the goals thing!
It’s better for kids to struggle with money than for college students to struggle with credit cards. I loved the breakdown of their allowance money: 10% to church, 20% to savings, 70% to themselves. I did that in college (well, 10% to savings but still) and it’s what kept me alive when I lost my job.
The sex talk at age 8. I liked how they handled this. My parents never handled it with me. I like how they talked about the inappropriate scenes on TV instead of just letting them see it and take what they want. We get into the habit of just blocking our kids eyes when bad stuff happens on TV but actually talking about it and how it’s not what we should do is a much better approach, I think.